There are probably closer to like 100 things I would tell myself before having children but that would be a pretty long and boring list so I'm going with 10. Sound good? I thought so, here we go!
1. You know nothing about parenting. You think you do but you just don't, period. Your friends with children may let you share your thoughts and opinions on parenting with them but as much as they love you they are rolling their eyes on the inside and thinking, "You'll see." And they're right; parenting just is one of those things that you can't understand until you're in it.
2. You're not busy. Scratch that, you may be busy but life after kids is a whole new level of busy. Enjoy the moments to yourself because they will be harder to come by after the kiddos start poppin' out. For the most part you won't mind how busy you are and you'll even enjoy most of it but there will be days where you just want 5 minutes to yourself and to actually finish something as stupid as reading your Facebook feed. It's selfish and silly but the 5 minutes of breathing room will make a huge difference and will re-charge for the next hour of Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, crying for no reason and doing the same puzzle 50 times in a row.
3.Travel. I've never had a desire to do a lot of traveling because I tend to be a homebody but even I wish we had done it more before Amelia. I'm so thankful for our trip to Mexico that we went on before we started trying to get pregnant but still wish we had done a few more trips like that. You can definitely still travel after babies but things are just different. Either your leaving your little tiny one at home which is like the MOST nerve racking and anxiety ridden thing you'll ever do or you'll bring them with you and let's be honest a vacation with kids is not really a vacation. {If you don't already know this, kids are a lot of work, like a lot.} Oh and some more free advice...if the resort you're at has a professional photographer, sign up for a session. I love good ole selfies but I'm so glad we have these beautiful pictures to help us remember our trip. Shout out to Excellence Playa Mujeres which I recommend over and over again to anyone who will listen to me.
4. Save money. I don't even know what I spent money on before we had kids. We're still working on this but it would have been much easier before daycare, diapers and baby girl clothes that is for sure. You don't need expensive purses, shoes and cars. You need a, "just in case shit goes down fund," and if shit doesn't go down it can be the kiddos college fund because at the rate college prices are increasing it's going to cost a million dollars for an education when our kids grow up.
5. Sleep. I never took naps until I got pregnant. I now mourn all the times I could have taken a nap. This is everyone's advice and even if you do follow it you'll still be more tired than you've ever been in your whole life and wish you had slept more before you had kids. It's just the way it is.
6. Get to know your partner and yourself. Travis and I had 7 years to experience the ups and downs of marriage. Some days I wish we hadn't waited so long to start a family and other days I'm thankful that we know each other so well that I don't have to say anything for him to know that I need help or that I didn't mean the terrible things I said to during Amelia's 2am meltdown. We roll with the punches together and don't get our feelings hurt with the small stuff. I am also thankful that we experienced so much as a couple and that we have so many special memories of the fun we had. Now, when we miss out on a NYE party or Rodeo Cook Off we don't really mind. {We're usually also too tired to care most of the time, hah} Here's one of my favorite throwbacks, kissing my cowboy in a Lubbock cotton field. <3
8. Do nothing on Saturdays. It won't happen often after kiddos so just do it while you still can.
9. You'll never be ready. You can read a million books and go to every breastfeeding, lamaze and parenting class but you're never going to be ready. This hit me the day my water broke. I got to the hospital and the nurse said, "You're next," {talking about my c-section because Amelia was breech} my stomach literally dropped like I was on a roller coaster. It was two weeks before my scheduled c-section but even if we had made it to that date, I still wouldn't have been ready. I was terrified but then I heard her cry and my life was changed forever. Motherhood really does come naturally but you will never fully be ready and that's okay. Enjoy your pregnancy and know that when the time comes you'll figure it out.
10. Let it go. {Yes, just like the song says} Things don't always go according to plan once little ones come into your life. Start learning to go with the flow before they get here. Spend less time planning for the future and more time enjoying the present.
Okay, these are what my friends and I came up with. What would you tell your pre-kid self? Let me know in the comments.
4. Save money. I don't even know what I spent money on before we had kids. We're still working on this but it would have been much easier before daycare, diapers and baby girl clothes that is for sure. You don't need expensive purses, shoes and cars. You need a, "just in case shit goes down fund," and if shit doesn't go down it can be the kiddos college fund because at the rate college prices are increasing it's going to cost a million dollars for an education when our kids grow up.
5. Sleep. I never took naps until I got pregnant. I now mourn all the times I could have taken a nap. This is everyone's advice and even if you do follow it you'll still be more tired than you've ever been in your whole life and wish you had slept more before you had kids. It's just the way it is.
6. Get to know your partner and yourself. Travis and I had 7 years to experience the ups and downs of marriage. Some days I wish we hadn't waited so long to start a family and other days I'm thankful that we know each other so well that I don't have to say anything for him to know that I need help or that I didn't mean the terrible things I said to during Amelia's 2am meltdown. We roll with the punches together and don't get our feelings hurt with the small stuff. I am also thankful that we experienced so much as a couple and that we have so many special memories of the fun we had. Now, when we miss out on a NYE party or Rodeo Cook Off we don't really mind. {We're usually also too tired to care most of the time, hah} Here's one of my favorite throwbacks, kissing my cowboy in a Lubbock cotton field. <3
Image by Lissa Anglin
7. Stop thinking you're fat-pre-kid and post-kid. WEAR THE DAMN BIKINI. You're not fat, you're beautiful. If you feel fat, do things to help you not feel fat but don't make yourself miserable. Love yourself as you are and if you have a little girl one day, teach her to do the same. 8. Do nothing on Saturdays. It won't happen often after kiddos so just do it while you still can.
9. You'll never be ready. You can read a million books and go to every breastfeeding, lamaze and parenting class but you're never going to be ready. This hit me the day my water broke. I got to the hospital and the nurse said, "You're next," {talking about my c-section because Amelia was breech} my stomach literally dropped like I was on a roller coaster. It was two weeks before my scheduled c-section but even if we had made it to that date, I still wouldn't have been ready. I was terrified but then I heard her cry and my life was changed forever. Motherhood really does come naturally but you will never fully be ready and that's okay. Enjoy your pregnancy and know that when the time comes you'll figure it out.
10. Let it go. {Yes, just like the song says} Things don't always go according to plan once little ones come into your life. Start learning to go with the flow before they get here. Spend less time planning for the future and more time enjoying the present.
Okay, these are what my friends and I came up with. What would you tell your pre-kid self? Let me know in the comments.
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